The Wolstanton When-ever-ly World Wide Website New year 2009 Edition!!
"I'm fed up with the same background!" exclaimed a reader,
The Wolstanton Online Periodical World Wide Website is best viewed using your eyes.
WARNING! Occasionally items are not entirely true. But then there's nothing stranger than the truth.
Posted 05/01/2009
Whoa! This is a biggie:
27/09/2008
PAUL NEWMAN
Top Hollywood film star most famous (to me) for Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.
13/11/2008
Mitch Mitchell last surviving member of the Jimi Hendrix Experience survives no longer.
09/12/2008
Oliver Postgate dies at 83
Who? Only the creator of Ivor the Engine, Norse prince Noggin the Nog, The Clangers AND Bagpuss.
14/12/2008
Cathy Staff died aged 80. Most famous for popularising wrinkled stocking as Nora Batty in Last of the Summer Wine.
24/12/2008
Wow a Christmas Eve special
Harold Pinter
Playwright, poet, political activist.
25/12/2008
The American singer and actress Eartha Kitt died on Christmas Day aged 81. Eartha has already immortalised herself by allowing the use of her name in Cockney Rhyming Slang
By special request:
Online Stereogram Generator
http://www.eyetricks.com/stereograms/onlinetools/stereocreator.htm
Now you can put your own rude message in!
Manchester United have come bottom of the league ...... for locally based supporters. Did I hear you gasp in amazement? I thought not! Makes you wonder who spends money on these surveys. However, it leads me on nicely to:
THE WOLSTANTON WHEN-EVER-LY GUIDE TO TEAM SELECTION:
.... or HOW TO CHOOSE THE TEAM YOU SUPPORT.
This is really easy. Take a pair of compasses from your old school bag. Put the sharp end on a map exactly where you were born. Now draw circles increasing in diameter until a club in the football league falls inside your circle. That is your team. Allow me to demonstrate:
I was born at 26, Kelvin Street, May Bank. OK ...... Red dot where I was born ..... draw circle ........ oh dear!! Up The Vale!!!!
Obviously if you have a brother AND sister BOTH born at the hospital then that gives you a special dispensation and you can be a Stoke fan. Oh yes, Don't forget Stoke's ground has moved since I was born.
www.broadbandspeedchecker.co.uk
Find out how fast your broadband isn't. My ISP just sent me a message telling me I now have up to 8Mb. They were right!! Up to includes the figure of 848Kb download and 370Kb upload.
Over Christmas I was reading the Beano with Joe. Some of the jokes are real groan making material. So, on Christmas Day I said to Joe "go and get that Beano and tell Grandad Arthur some jokes". So he did. Starting with ......
Q: What smells of carrots and is invisible?
A: Bunny Farts!
We left it at that.
Floating Dog
Chinese at Work (ever wondered wny we can't compete??)
Possibly the best ever sketch from this pair
While were in Yorkshire, Four Yorkshiremen. I think this was the first time it came out:
Merry Christmas (No it's not too late. They used to play this all year round when they were touring.)
Goodbye Carol
The Vodermann did her last Countdown this week. Unbelievable but true, this show launched Channel 4 in 1982. That's 28 years of Countdown! and Carol still is babe-licious! Lou seems to think Carol has had "work done". I choose to believe people of my generation look young naturally.
Happy Birthday Prince Charles! I knew you'd be thrilled.
Israeli police have had to restore order at one of Christianity's holiest sites after a mass brawl broke out between monks in Jerusalem's Old City.
Fighting erupted between Greek Orthodox and Armenian monks at the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, the traditional site of Christ's crucifixion.
Two monks from each side were detained as dozens of worshippers traded kicks and punches at the shrine, said police.
Trouble flared as Armenians prepared to mark the annual Feast of the Cross.
Tapestries toppled
Shocked pilgrims looked on as decorations and tapestries were toppled during Sunday's clash.
Dressed in the vestments of the Greek Orthodox and Armenian denominations, rival monks threw punches and anything they could lay their hands on.
The Greeks blamed the Armenians for not recognising their rights inside the holy site, while the Armenians said the Greeks had violated one of their traditional ceremonies.
An Armenian clergyman said the Greek clergy had tried to place one of their monks inside the Edicule, an ancient structure which is said to encase the tomb of Jesus.
"What is happening here is a violation of status quo. The Greeks have tried so many times to put their monk inside the tomb but they don't have the right to when the Armenians are celebrating the feast," he said.
The Armenians had been preparing to commemorate the 4th Century discovery of the cross believed to have been used to crucify Jesus.
A Greek clergyman said: "We protested peacefully, we stood here in the middle and we claimed that we shall not leave the procession finished unless they leave our guardian be inside. This didn't happen and in that moment the police interfered."
Six Christian sects share control of the ancient church and the BBC's Wyre Davies in Jerusalem says confrontations between them are not uncommon, but rarely descend into violence.
Only one worthy of mention here:
Robert Plant has been awarded a CBE for services to ROCK. Nice one Planty!
Despite advanced technology and computer modelling The Met Office STILL get it wrong just too often. This is mostly the case when predicting snow. I've lost count of how many times I've woken expecting a white blanket covering the ground only to be dissappointed.
Here's a brand new symbol for when they can't quite make their mind up.
Premiership new boys:
Stoke: Seem determined to slide down the table. Having said that they are suffering at the hands of the officials. Too many 50/50 decisions going the way of the big teams. Let's hope the defeat to HARTLEPOOL in the FA Cup is the low point of the season.
Baggies: look set to boing-boing off the bottom of the table if they can keep the current winning streak up.
Hull: When are the wheels coming off their season??!! Boy have they been lucky this year! Wonder what the odds are for Stoke finishing above them?
DARTS
Local boy Mr Power Taylor got his 14th world title. Well done him.
05/01/2009
HAPPY BIRTHDAY WEDGWOOD
Wedgwood celebrated 250 years in business this week in style. They went into administration.
Circulation 16