The Wolstanton Weekly World Wide Website!!
The Wolstanton Weekly World Wide Website is best viewed 800X600 using your eyes.
WARNING! Occasionally items are not entirely true.
Just in case you didn't take it seriously:
The Website of the Week is another of those handy places. The Telephone Preference Service is set up to stop those nuisance phone calls you get at all times of the day. It's leagally binding too! All you need to do is register.
www.tps-online.org.uk
The counting in the pole has finished now and here are the eagerly awaited results
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5, TXT - 0 votes
6, EXE - 0 votes
7, Don't understand any of the above. - 0 votes
Don't forget, if you didn't vote you can't complain!
The Editor would like to thank all the readers for their show of support. "Freedom of choice counts for a lot" said a tired Ed, "It's great to be able to produce the Weekly Organ how I please. I'm glad everyone understood the pole and it's significance".
Northern Ireland Update
Now The DUP have the most seats in the assembly we will have to put up with that flippin' Rev. Ian Paisley wittering on about burning Catholics.
Peacetime Update
Has anyone noticed the increased frequency of attacks on Allied Forces?
Not much happened this week again. You'll be thinking there isn't a band soon!
The Family Mahone at The Limelight Crewe.
Drinking songs for drinking people. Mark Radcliff, singer, drummer and world famous Radio 1 D.J., drank no fewer than four pints on stage. He was steaming by the end of the gig!
Oh yes! The music was good too.
It seems that God received a delegation of animals complaining of their lot in life. There was an elephant, a giraffe, and a hen.
The elephant complained, "Lord, I HATE THIS TRUNK YOU have given me. It gets in the way, and makes me look like a fool!"
The Lord said, "Don't complain. It lets you pick up food, drink water, etc. without getting wet!"
Next the giraffe complained, "Lord, I HATE THIS LONG NECK! It makes me top heavy, I get terrible neck pains, and people laugh at me!"
The Lord said, "Don't complain. It lets you pick the best fruit and leaves from the high branches, and allows you to see a distance."
The hen spoke up, "Lord, I don't want to complain, but either let me have a bigger ass or smaller eggs."
"Tinted:"
Footie:
Carling Cup Mid-Week Special
West Brom(1st Division) 2-0 Manchester United(Premiership). You see? There is a god!!
06/12/03
Stoke 2-3 Cardiff. Stoke have finally arrived in the drop zone.
Crewe 1-1 Gillingham
07/12/03 FA Cup
Port Vale 0-1 Scarborough
Have you noticed just how busy December is? It took Lou's uncle an hour to drive the half mile home from Tesco the other day. There are times when legs are useful!
Just you wait and see, there'll be a hosepipe ban next year! Remember, you read it here first.
My box remains empty. Even my Mum hasn't e-mailed me! Maybe it would help if I told her how to?
There will be a next edition and it could be in a format chosen by the Editor!!!!