The Wolstanton Weekly World Wide Website Special Local Edition
The Wolstanton Weekly World Wide Website is best viewed 800X600 using your eyes.
WARNING! Occasionally items are not entirely true.
Posted 11/07/04.
www.justgiving.com/loubigfoot The golden opportunity of being the first on-line sponsor STILL awaits the lucky first on-line sponsor.
Potteries entertainer Mel Scholes died this week aged 57. That's not much really.
TOP STORY:
GREAT DAYS OUT:
Waterworld, Festival Park, Stoke-on-Trent.
You could have knocked me down with a feather. £22.50 for a family of four. How Much! I only want to go swimming. To make matters worse the locker robs me of fifty pee just to keep our clothes in and round the cost up to 23 English pounds. Mind you, you do get some fantastic things for your money like:
1, Blocked drains in the gents,
2, Litter and a dreadful smell in the changing room,
3, Paint peeling on most of the rides,
4, Litter and plasters in the water,
And to top it all, There's nowhere to swim.
The kids loved it.
NEW WW READER:
The Editor Would Like To Give A Warm Wolstanton Weekly Welcome To His Old Mate From School Dave "Dodo" Booth.
ELECTION ROUND UP:
Crikey! I nearly forgot. Local and European elections took place recently. A couple of utterly unbeleivable things happened. Firstly, Robert Kilroy Silk, former crap TV show host and racist, was voted in for the UK Indepedance Party. Secondly, in the local elections the BNP took two seats on Longton. Every other seat they contended they came second, and not by much. Makes you think. Well it make me think anyway.
Peace has been handed over to the interim Iraq government so anything from here on is their fault.
One Saturday, a man was out in his front yard raking the leaves. At one point, his neighbour came up to him and asked, "May I borrow your chain saw?"
"Certainly," said the man. The neighbour took the chain saw and returned it later in the day.
The following Saturday, the man was out in his front yard mowing the lawn. His neighbour came up to him again and asked, "May I borrow your chain saw?"
"Sure," said the man. The neighbour took the chain saw and returned it later in the day.
This went on for the next ten Saturdays.
The man began to wonder if his neighbour was taking advantage of him. It is one thing for a neighbour to borrow a tool two, three, or even four weekends in a row. But twelve weekends in a row is quite another. After all, wear and tear is put on a tool every time it is used, regardless of who is using it. If his neighbour had that much clear-cutting to do, then by rights he ought to buy his own chain saw.
On the thirteenth Saturday, the man’s neighbour came up to him yet again and asked, "May I borrow your chain saw?"
The man decided that enough was enough.
"Well, actually, no," replied the man. "You see, I’m using my chain saw today. As a matter of fact, I’m going to be using my chain saw all weekend."
"Oh," said the neighbour. "In that case, may I borrow your golf clubs?"
AngryNews:
Drums have been recorded to four songs. You'll lke it when it's done. For more info go to www.angrysongs.co.uk
"Still Safer"
Footy:
Transfer market.
Crewe skipper Brammer moves to Stoke making him one of not many to play for all three local clubs.
Leeds failed to attract a Port Vale striker. Oh how the mighty have fallen.
Formula 1:
British Grand Prix
The cars go round and round and the Red ones win again by using an absolutely thrilling pit stop strategy.
Coldest July on record! So say the men with the records.
The D Road is almost unrecogisable now. Lots of earth has been shifted.
Another quiet week.
Click Here to unsubscribe.
Circulation 10